Tumblers League Table

Falls Tumbler Where & How
1= Mr David Hayes

Bat & Ball A long time since this firm favourite’s last appearance here. So we can be sure it was something spectacular! Oh, it wasn’t. Came off at a trot in a muddy field. However, as he confessed willingly, we will be kind and say no more. We wont go on about clumsiness or gauchness. Just one of those things; honestly, could happen to anyone ... [But it didn’t, it happened to him - Ed]

1= Ms Henrietta Patterson

Opening Meet Out of the saddle and into the record books. Off after 40 secs, possibly less. A great moment. A side-saddle supremo, Henrietta was astride today [But not for very long - Ed]

1= Mr Richard Milne

Opening Meet New subscriber, new opportnities! Ex-cavalry [Are you sure? — Ed]. Did not disappoint over the hedges. Flamboyance rating: 9 (Hunt coat ripped apart). Man of Iron credentials: 10 (Straight back on tho’ no idea where he was).

1= Miss Jo Burdett

Opening Meet Well, it had to happen sooner rather than later. And it did. Sooner rather than later. The circumstances are murky. [They always are, they always are - Ed]

1= Miss Grace Bolton

Opening Meet Plucky youngster = unlucky youngster. Nevertheless, one to watch. Could give the junior Edges a run for their money this season.

1= Miss Nicola Lyon-Maris

Opening Meet Agent SloweWorm makes a good point: “In my book if a horse sinks to its knees for no apparent reason resulting in a forced dismount by its rider, THAT COUNTS…." Who are we to disagree?

1= Miss Sophie Lawes Petsells Keeping it in the family. A far more elegant dismount than her father (see below). It's never easy for our amateur whips but her charming, if convulted, self-justification disarmed us enough to be magnanimous.

1= Mr Graham Lawes Holland Wood Always satisfying to break in a new horse away from the glare of the public eye. But we see you, we see you …

1= Mr Paul Lyon-Maris Malham Farm You a horse. You are from Leicestershire. You have no idea what a gate is. So whatever this metal thing is, you'll just jump it, won’t you? Yes you will. And you did. From a standstill.

1= Ms Harriet Anstruther Holland Wood With regret, being the scion of a hunting and landowning dynasty offers no protection from the inevitable …

1= Miss Scarlett Edge Petsells The on-going bankruptcy of the Edge family continues. If I bury it down here no-one will surely notice

1= Grace from the Harry Dzenis Yard Pallingham Manor Farm Interesting. It refused to move. It reared. It refused to move again. And was all sweetness and light thereafter. Between the inertia it deposited its rider, which is always nice for us